Love and War

Marriage is beautiful—and hard.

In Love & War, John and Stasi Eldredge speak with astonishing vulnerability about their own marriage journey, sharing honest lessons from their struggles and the breakthroughs they’ve experienced. Bringing both male and female perspectives, they offer a balanced, refreshing take on the realities of marriage—neither sugarcoating its challenges nor resigning to its hardships.

They begin with a confession: marriage is fabulously hard. But the deeper truth they uncover is that the real battle isn’t between husband and wife—it’s against an Enemy who seeks to destroy love. With hope and wisdom, they show how couples can fight for each other rather than against each other.

Why this book matters

Many couples find themselves disillusioned by the gap between their expectations and the reality of marriage. Arguments, distance, and misunderstandings can lead to feeling stuck, or even hopeless.

Love & War helps readers:

• Understand the spiritual battle beneath relational conflict

• Reframe marriage as a shared journey, not a personal competition

• Learn practical ways to fight for love and connection

• Find hope in God’s design for marriage, even through pain

• See their relationship as part of a larger love story

These themes are further explored in the Love & War Video Series, which expands on the concepts with teaching and conversation starters for couples.

What you’ll discover in Love & War

• Why marriage is harder than we expect – And why that doesn’t mean it’s broken.

• The unseen spiritual war over your relationship – How to recognize the Enemy’s schemes and protect your marriage.

• Practical steps to restore intimacy and trust – Simple ways to reconnect and heal.

• **A bigger story for your love **– Seeing your marriage as part of God’s grand love story.

For women exploring the journey of love and identity, Captivating offers further insight into the feminine heart, while Wild at Heart speaks to the masculine perspective.

Who should read this book?

This book is for:

• Engaged couples preparing for marriage with realistic expectations

• Married couples—whether newlyweds or decades in—seeking deeper connection

• Those feeling distant, disillusioned, or stuck in cycles of conflict

• Anyone wanting to understand marriage as a spiritual and relational journey

For a deeper dive into restoring intimacy and purpose, consider The Journey of Desire by John Eldredge.

Love & War as a group study for churches & small groups

Love & War is an ideal resource for small groups, marriage ministries, or couples’ retreats. Honest and hopeful, it sparks meaningful conversations and offers a way forward for every couple.

Why use this for a church or group study?

• Encourages authentic dialogue about the real challenges of marriage

• Provides a spiritual lens for understanding relational conflict

• Helps couples learn to fight together against what threatens their love

• Includes discussion prompts and tools for practical application

Pair with the Love & War Video 8- Study Sessions will help couples find their way to something beautiful in their marriage.

Restoring the Heart of Marriage

Love & War brings the Wild at Heart message into the sacred union of marriage, offering hope, honesty, and practical wisdom for couples navigating both beauty and hardship together.

It’s a powerful resource for helping husbands and wives reconnect, fight for one another, and rediscover the larger love story God has written for their relationship.

To explore these themes further, consider John and Stasi Eldredge’s other works, including Captivating and Wild at Heart.