Like many women my age, the COVID 19 pandemic has exposed not only false comforters in my life and heart, but the roots of my hair. Unearthing the roots of unhealthy patterns in my life for the purposes of healing and freedom is a most welcome move of God. The revealing of my expansive gray previously hidden underneath the skill of a marvelous beauty salon technician is another matter.
I’m 60 years old. Am I ready to be gray? I always imagined myself as an older woman with long gray hair ignoring my mother’s exhortations to cut it once I turned 45. But that is years away, isn’t it?
Last week, I had the privilege of laying on the bed with my daughter (in-law) who had given birth the day before to her and my son’s first son. We had all quarantined in such a way so that my husband and I could be there, be helpful, offer care for them and our other precious granddaughter.
Anyway, there we were lying on the bed and she lifted up her nightgown exposing her motherly belly and began to speak aloud blessings to her body. “I bless you my organs as you shift back into place.” “I bless you my stretch marks.” “I bless you my post-partum body.” She went on. It was powerful. It was stunning. It was needed. And it IS rare.
Her body had carried, then labored and delivered an 8 pound human being! How miraculous! What a wonder! It now is entering the recovery stage. It won’t be the same body she knew prior to becoming pregnant with her son regardless of what tabloid articles suggest. I bless her and I bless God that she both knows that and embraces it.
Embracing the move of God in her body as it changes and functions and matures is a beautiful thing. Embracing the move of God in any part of our lives is a beautiful thing. He moves within us and around us. He moves for us and through us. The more we say “Yes’ to his moves and cooperate with him – the more beautiful we are.
There are areas in my life that I feel his invitation to say “Yes” to that aren’t easy yet my heart’s deepest desire it to follow him wherever he leads. He is faithful and he is worthy of my trust. He has my ultimate “Yes” over my life.
I don’t feel though, that he is overly concerned with the color of my hair. He wants me to like it - to feel good about it regardless of what color I choose it to be. But here and now, I am learning from my daughter and I am blessing my changing and aging body and the shifting shade of my hair. The old has gone, the new has come! I am 60 years old. I have long gray hair. I bless it.