Session 3
Becoming the Man You Were Born to Be

What did God mean when he meant you? What if desire reveals design and design reveals destiny?

Watch Session 3


“There are many people who think they want to be matadors, only to find themselves in the ring with 2,000 pounds of bull bearing down on them, and then discover that what they really wanted was to wear tight pants and hear the crowd roar.” –Terry Pearce

Who have I become? And who am I becoming?

These are the central questions to recover masculine initiation.

After the fall of man, Adam confessed, “I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid.” Adam’s story is every man’s story. We have become who we are not. We are haunted by fear of failure and the taunting of what we lack within. In response to our terror, we form caricatures to help us deny our vulnerability and independently survive. Yet the self-protective man we have become is not the truest us. What if we have a destiny to reflect aspects of God’s heart that no one else exactly reflects, a destiny to offer a unique strength? Through recovering who we were born to be, we can shift from withering in the angst of our unvalidated soul to recovering a true and genuine strength to bring to the world.

The truest reality of the masculine soul is that we are inheritors of original goodness, magnificently crafted in the image of God. As Jesus promised, out of putting to death the false within a man, a greater life emerges. It is here we are welcomed to risk engaging in the extraordinary process of recovering an indestructible life, a life of ever-deepening union with God. A life worth living.

Let’s dig in.


(Study guide pages 64-65)

  1. Describe your false self, or yourself as “the poser.” How and where do you hide?
  2. What do you fear the people closest to you would say if they were asked to describe you?
  3. Observe your motives and how you are currently engaging with your family, in your work, and beyond. Where are you living for identity and where are you living from it?
  4. Describe your true self. Who is the man you are meant to be but are not yet? What is he like?


I was afraid, because I was naked; so I hid.

Genesis 3:10 NIV


Whoever has ears, let them hear what the Spirit says to the churches. To the one who is victorious, I will give some of the hidden manna. I will also give that person a white stone with a new name written on it, known only to the one who receives it.

Revelation 2:17 NIV


One of the foundational beliefs of this message is that God is the initiator and we are simply invited to respond and participate. In each session, you’re invited to choose a two-minute pause to let the message soak into your soul, let questions arise, and let God shine his light.


God, I invite you into this space to participate in stillness with you. Here and now I choose to recover my breath. I turn my attention and affection to you, God, and what you have prepared for me in this time. I choose two minutes to breathe and center in you.

Take Action

Read chapter 3 and 4 of Becoming a King.

Complete session 3 from the Becoming a King Study Guide.

Further Excavation

  • Watch the film The Secret Life of Walter Mitty. Start with the extended trailer for a brief introduction. Consider the gap between Walter Mitty’s daydreams and his daily reality. Can you resonate with this? What would it be like to discover an adventure journal left specifically for you from your dad, with the words “Have Fun” etched on the inside cover?

Morgan's message for this week

Going Deeper

The Audiobook

With exclusive audiobook-only content, Morgan Snyder’s Becoming a King unabashedly speaks directly to men, teaching them the life-changing truth about the power that God intends for them to responsibly step into for his kingdom.

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Becoming a King Book

The Book

Becoming a King offers men a map to the narrow road of becoming the kind of man to whom God can entrust his kingdom, while also giving women insight and an honest look into their hearts and lives.

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The Study Guide

This study includes video notes, group discussion questions, and between-session personal study for each session.

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